Thursday, April 25, 2013

Definitely Half EMPTY

I bought some potato chips today. Good for me right? Well, I opened the bag and looked inside to find that the bad was only half-filled with chips! What. A. Ripoff. I'm certain we've all experienced this before, but that doesn't make it okay. Now, I can tolerate the increase in the price of chips if I have to, but don't insult me by filling the bad halfway to make me think I'm getting more. In the very least, it is a waste of bagging material; if the bag size actually represented the amount of chips inside it could probably stop global warming or something.
The other side may say something like: "the extra space provides a cushion so the chips remain crunchy, instead of breaking into tiny crumbly pieces." To that I say: bolshevik. Give me chips, or give me, well, chips. You don't need extra space, these chips aren't flying first class. Put them in coach because they are going to a far worse place in the end.
Also, the chip companies could learn a lot from the pretzel people. Have you ever seen bags of pretzels? They are PACKED TO THE BRIM with pretzels; I almost feel like the bag is gonna explode if I pinch it. That's how it should be done.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Unlucky Colors Exist

Something strange happened at the hotel today. A guest walked to the front desk to purchase a toothbrush, since he forgot his. I handed him a random selection from the bag, and it happened to be yellow. He immediately shied away, and said, "Hey I'm sorry but do you have ANY other color but yellow? I'm not trying to be one of the OCD people, but yellow is my unlucky color. So can I please have a different color?" I was astounded - an unlucky color?!? Does this guy stay away from the sun, lemons and bananas too? How does he live? Maybe he just had a bad dream about Pac Man or something. Either way I cracked some joke about how it'd be bad news to have bad luck while brushing your teeth and got him another colored brush.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013


I went to Costco with Krista today. We walked into the store, I flashed my member card (like a boss) and strutted into the warehouse. We were immediately greeted by 'television guy' - that dude who gets paid to watch TV on 8 giant flatscreens and occasionally bother you as you walk in. Well, we made it past him with no problems. Little did we know what we had in store next. (haha pun).

The next booth down looked like a water cooler you would see in the office, and that's pretty much all it was. There stood one guy in a polo shirt, next to the water cooler and behind a little black table. As we walked past, he shouted "Water!" and held a cup of liquid out to us. We laughed, thinking he was joking, but a couple seconds later he did it again: "water!"
Now, I don't know what was wrong with this guy, maybe he had a super tough day at the water station and was losing his mind, maybe he was fed up with the fact that NOBODY wanted his water. That desperate plea "water!" must have been his last resort, as he wished to god he had been assigned the ravioli station or something instead.

The funniest part was when I ran back to the front to get a cart (who walks into Costco without a cart???) and I saw 'water guy' with his head in his arms, leaning on the water cooler. He MUST have had a rough day, poor guy.

P.S. Later at Costco we had champagne and orange juice in our cart (for guess what day...) and the pop corn sample guy said that popcorn goes well with mimosas. Who knew?